Is it inappropriate to text someone at a time when you wouldn't call them? If so, my apologies, ladies... I'm home alone tonight. Usually I'm kinda cool with it, but tonight I am just feeling douchey all around, so the absence of people makes it just that much easier to be blah. Pathy is (finally) at her sleep study... I've been telling her she may have sleep apnea for close to five years now! Erika is doing the overnight. I should be sleeping since we are going to a wedding in Manhattan tomorrow. Ugh. I am so not in the mood for a long drive, dressing up, etc. I'm afraid my clothes aren't fancy enough, but I am working with our budget, our local mall, my chode-shaped body and PMS. Not cute. The two of us at the store(s) trying to find suitable clothes that we a)liked, b)fit into c)could afford... just not cute. Buuut we managed. I have a new bra that's basically HUGE. But that's to be expected. Plus we are staying with her parents for the night and will have to get up at lame o'clock in the morning so I can get to work on time on Saturday. I'm getting out at 8pm on Saturday for Pathy's 30th birthday party!!!!!!!! We are just now having our friends party, even though her birthday was weeks ago at this point... We had a lot of fun staying with her family at the cabin for the actual day; I suspect this will be a slightly different kinda party. BTW Kevin, if you read this, I'm sorry we're not watching dancing! Believe me, I wish we were. But I got two (2) thirty (30) packs of Coors for you kids. And some other essential party items. Like chips. And cheese/crackers/pepperoni. Strawberry shortcake stuffffff.... mmmm. I love that we had strawberry shortcake as our wedding cake :) And I hate that I'm going to sleep alone :(

I got Pathy's birthday messages all printed out and put in a book today... Of course our printer is currently disabled and the flash drive I borrowed turned out to formatted for a Mac... so it took a little longer than I was hoping for; but it's all done now and it looks really good! Twelve pages of nice notes from people from all over! Super! The book I found at Walmart, it's black and white but has teal lining on the inside. I looked for paper there to match but figured I'd have better luck at Office Max (which is where I printed from). They had THE PERFECT black and white paper with little teal boundaries around where the text goes!!! Couldn't have worked out better in that department!!!! I've been messing with Pathy, pretending I have absolutely nothing for her and am in total despair... hehe. Honestly, I would like to have an actual *present* as in something one buys in the store, but I'm just really broke and spent my money on the book, the paper, the printing, a card, a bag and tissue paper... I think she'll be perfectly happy with the book, but I would also like to get her something totally pimp. She is turning 30, after all. Suggestions?

"Homo-flexible (attracted mostly to the same sex, but have some attraction to opposite sex)"

Hahahahahhahaha!!!! Yeah, exactly!!!


Go here to help a Human Sexuality graduate student and take an interesting survey!

Pathy and I are on the front page of the paper today... hahahhahahahhaha. We went to a pride picnic here in Oneonta and people from the local newspaper came and talked with lots of folks... so I'm not too sure how we were chosen to go on the front of the paper, but it appears that we were!

http://www.thedailystar.com/homepage

1. A week ago yesterday I went to urgent care for a "boil" that had gone above and beyond and was killing me... ended up in the ER getting it drained, and had to pack a huge hole in my gut full of gauze and saline twice a day for a week... I went for a follow-up visit today and was told that it is healing well, no longer needs to be packed, just put this cream on it and cover it with gauze. AWESOME! And another week of light duty. You guys are all lucky that I don't have a cord to download pics of my nastiness from my phone... but honestly, it was disgusting. And large. More than an inch in diameter and a few cm deep. And I found out today that I had MRSA as well... which I'm sure I got at work since we had several cases of it there. But the PA I saw today said that the antibiotics I took over the past week should have taken care of it and I should see my PCP for another culture after this thing is totally healed. I'm just so relieved to not be in so much pain... I was taking wayyyyyyyy too many pain relievers just get through the day. I've been alternating between trying to just go into zen meditation and forget that I even have pain receptors and a body and getting all fight club on myself and just focusing on the pain and the moment and the life experience and the humanity of it all! lol

2. Pathy's 30th birthday is now only eleven days away. I juuuuust had the idea YESTERDAY for her present... which involves collecting personalized messages from as many people as I can who know and love my wife... this entailed me sending facebook message after facebook message and following up with a few emails. So far I have eight responses... not too bad for the first day after asking. I hope to get a shit ton more just because I know they will mean a lot to her. Pathy will pretty much go 10,000 miles out of her way just to help someone she doesn't even know, so I know her friends and family all have plenty of wonderful things to say... I think it would be super if she had it in writing to keep forever.

3. Speaking of my wife, she truly is a saint. She changed my bandages two times a day, every single day for a week, helped me in the shower, washed my hair and even shaved my legs for me once! She went to the store to buy the stuff we needed to do the procedure, she was gentle, she was nice to me while I cried and just took such good care of me that it's making me cry again now. OH. And by the way, that was all AFTER she held my hand in the ER until I BRUISED it while they shot the booboo with local anesthetic, cut it open with a blade, squeezed, poked, scraped, cut, etc... you know, I have to say... I always thought morphine would be wayyy more effective.

4. Ok, seriously. Ever since I got this thing I've been crying my eyes out over EVERYTHING. Happy things, sad things, painful things, even just thinking about them or anticipating what might happen... I honestly can not remember a period in my life where I could have possibly cried this much.

5. Father's Day is this weekend... what to get the father?! He is so hard to buy for. He's been on voluntary unemployment from the factory he has worked at for close to 36 years and couldn't be happier. If they offer him another 30 days when he calls tomorrow, he has every intention of taking it. He has been enjoying himself, finally! After all these years of working inside that place (where he wouldn't even take us, even on family picnic day), he is getting a chance to lay low, sleep in, work around the house, spend time with his dad, etc. I'm glad to know that he is getting some time to himself... he sure does deserve it. I would like to have a picture of my grandfather, father, brother and nephew... if only I could find my camera...

C'mon... you know you wanna.

1. Your Middle Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Movie:
5. Favorite Song or Album:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of LJ?
10. What's your philosophy on life?
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
13. What is your favorite memory of us?
14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarky) - what are they?
17. Can we get together and make a cake?
18. Which country is your spiritual home?
19. What is your big weakness?
20. Do you think I'm a good person?
21. What was your best/favorite subject at school?
22. Describe your accent
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?
24. What do you wear to sleep?
25. Trousers or skirts?
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy, it'll entertain me!)
28. Will you repost this so i can fill it out for you?

I got some lacy, ruffled undies with little rainbows all over them... they were a big hit ;)

Other than that, it's all SSDD... We're going to visit the Hilliards on Monday and it is making my week go slowwwww! We're gonna do other things after we leave their house, but I have no idea what yet... just wife bonding time, mostly :)

( ok, that's enough personality quizzes )

More dreams about being unprepared for school this morning: I'm on the school bus and realize that I haven't done my English homework for Mr. Luettger's English class. I am fumbling through my backpack trying to find the necessary tools to do it (a notebook, a pen and a dictionary). The contents of my backpack and falling out everywhere, half the time the bag is not even mine, the notebook turns out to be graph paper, etc. I call up to Heather Melita for help and she is making out with Kristi Veenhof several seats up (yeah, high school crushes!)... I see them stop and then Heather comes back to my seat with her homework in hand; she gives it to me to copy and returns to her seat. I try and reorganize but everything is still falling all over the floor, I can't find an empty page in my notebook, the only pen I can find is a red calligraphy pen... etc, etc, etc. I finally get my resources together and find that I still can't copy Heather's work. I read the letters on the page but when I go to write them, they are all the wrong letters. I keep trying to copy the paper and get it done, but get it wrinkled and lose it several times amongst my mess in the process... never did finish. Then we are in class and I don't have my English book, I haven't read the story, and it appears that everyone else has several pages of critique on the story that they've written in front of them, and I don't have that either. I have another text book that is about equal in size and open it in front of me, but I'm secretly reading along with the guy next to me, who is somewhat in my personal space anyway.

I was beginning to wonder if I was moving past the school and shoe dreams because I hadn't had one of either in quite some time...

I've been more productive in the past three hours than I am in entire *days* in this apartment sometimes... went to move my car, went to Dollar General and got some gloves for cleaning and doing the dishes (as well as some cereal, milk, granola bars and Craisins), did the dishes in the sink, cleaned out the fridge, did the dishes from that, bagged up all the garbages and took five bags to the dumpster, bagged the recyclables, and a few other small things... like putting coats in the closet and removing my shoes from under the computer, etc. I would still like to pick up a few things in the common areas and straighten up the bedroom before calling it a day and watching the Pink Floyd documentary "The Pink Floyd Story: Which One's Pink?"


*post hibernation stretch*

Date:	2009-03-09 10:04
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	nauseated

Sooo, my latest mishap took place yesterday in my car on the way to work. I stopped at Hess so one of the guys riding to campus with me could run in, I was super thirsty and saw there was water bottle on his side so I grabbed it, wiped off the sport cap and got in a few good gulps before I realized it was the laundry detergent...!!! It was in a blue bottle so I never noticed the suspicious color. SO EFFING DISGUSTING. I found a little actual water in my trunk, Joel gave me some of the Red Bull he'd just purchased and Kevin gave me some gum... but the taste of salty lemon chemical perfume just would not leave my mouth, nose and throat areas. I drank a bunch of water, some milk and ate close to a sleeve of Saltines when I got to work. We'd just been discussing how it I'd gotten up so recently in the day that it was impossible to tell what kind of day it was going to be... two minutes later, I'm drinking detergent. If you're wondering why the detergent was in a water bottle, it's because the jug of it is so immense that it's just silly to carry it around. And I've found out the hard way way too many times that laundry detergent freezes.

Sometimes I really miss my wife when she goes out of town...

*lonely*


( just because )

Besides all the complaints of disease from my last post; it appears to be day one of my period... WTF?! So I'm in the shower, just breathing and bleeding and trying to go all zen about it and Phish's "Down With Disease" comes on the cd player... hahaha.

I have an upper respiratory infection... and exacerbated asthma due to said upper respiratory infection. I went to urgent care at Bassett today mainly because I couldn't stop wheezing and because I needed to know if I would be able to work the rest of the week... figuring they would definitely want a doctor's note if I was going to be out for three out of four days of the work week. It started with me and a blood pressure cuff, then had an oxygen sensor on my finger, then a nebulizer treatment, then a monitor on my chest and side and then they decided to do an EKG since my heart would not stop pounding and pulse would not go down. Even though it was pretty clear that the coughing was the main problem and I wasn't having a heart attack or anything... ended up in a gown with sticky pads on my arms, legs, abdomen, chest, sides... jeeeeez!!! They gave me another neb treatment before I was able to leave with my FIVE prescriptions... one of which was for an ointment for my fingers, which I wasn't able to get at the pharmacy because it is so expensive that apparently my insurance requires pre-authorization and proof I need it... I have a prescription, what more proof do you need? Other than that, I got the Z pack, an albuterol inhaler, prednisone (which is supposed to help my chest and my fingers but I hate taking steroids), and Robittusin with codeine... and a note to be out of work on Saturday and Sunday. Pathy was sick last week and I spent a lot of time nursing her back to health and creating a germ warfare of my own... so friends beware- if you around me, you will probably get it too. Sorry.

If I was a profession I'd be: a massage therapist to the "disabled"
If I was a country I'd be: ireland
If I was a ocean or body of water: cayuga lake
If I was a piece of candy I'd be: one of those strawberries with the syrupy stuff inside.. ;)
If I was a famous building or piece of architecture I'd be: the taj mahal
If I was a store I'd be: a yarn shop/bookstore
If I was a brand of shoe I'd be: aurora shoes! still have don't have any, though :(
If I was a bad habit I'd be: procrastination!!
If I was a swear word I'd be: fuck
If I was a ice cream flavour I'd be: butter pecan
If I was a disease I'd be: eczema
If I was a board game I'd be: scrabble
If I was a feeling I'd be: meditative
If I was a president I'd be: the right wing's righmare.
If I was a war I'd be: over. (yeah,chelle carrr)
If I was a city I'd be: ithaca
If I was a colour I'd be: pink
If I was a celebrity I'd be: generous
If I was a movie I'd be: mona lisa smile
If I was a brand of toothpaste: tom's
If I was a business I'd be: the love business
If I was a currency I'd be: the peace dollar!! (they really made it in the 20's!)
If I were a month, I'd be: may
If I were a day of the week, I'd be: sunday
If I were a time of day, I'd be: night
If I were a planet, I'd be: jupiter
If I were a sea animal, I'd be: sea turtle
If I were a direction, I'd be: north west
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be: a seriously pimpin' recliner
If I were a sin, I'd be: sloth
If I were a liquid, I'd be: water
If I were a bird, I'd be: a cardinal
If I were a tool, I'd be: circular saw
If I were a flower/plant, I'd be: aloe
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be: sunny, blue sky, roughly 70 degrees.
If I were a cartoon character I'd be: marmaduke
If I were an animal, I'd be: dog
If I were a vegetable, I'd be: summer squash
If I were a sound, I'd be: bluegrass
If I were an element, I'd be: metal (chinese elements)
If I were a car, I'd be: a vw bus
If I were a song, I'd be: rockin'
If I were a book, I'd be: fall on your knees
If I were a food, I'd be: manicotti
If I were a material, I'd be: hemp
If I were a taste, I'd be: savory
If I were a word, I'd be: ginger
If I were a body part, I'd be: hips
If I were a facial expression, I'd be: a smile of recognition
If I were a shape, I'd be: round
If I were a number, I'd be: 44
If I were a piece of jewelry, I'd be: necklace
If I were a speed, I'd be: slow
If I were a name, I'd be: elysedoyle
If I were a disorder, I'd be: autism
If I were a royal job, I'd be: "princess"

The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock
T.S. Eliot

S’io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s’i’odo il vero,
Senza tema d’infamia ti rispondo.


LET us go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out against the sky
Like a patient etherised upon a table;
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
The muttering retreats
Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
Streets that follow like a tedious argument
Of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming question …
Oh, do not ask, “What is it?”
Let us go and make our visit.

In the room the women come and go
Talking of Michelangelo.

The yellow fog that rubs its back upon the window-panes,
The yellow smoke that rubs its muzzle on the window-panes
Licked its tongue into the corners of the evening,
Lingered upon the pools that stand in drains,
Let fall upon its back the soot that falls from chimneys,
Slipped by the terrace, made a sudden leap,
And seeing that it was a soft October night,
Curled once about the house, and fell asleep.

And indeed there will be time
For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes;
There will be time, there will be time
To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet;
There will be time to murder and create,
And time for all the works and days of hands
That lift and drop a question on your plate;
Time for you and time for me,
And time yet for a hundred indecisions,
And for a hundred visions and revisions,
Before the taking of a toast and tea.

In the room the women come and go
Talking of Michelangelo.

And indeed there will be time
To wonder, “Do I dare?” and, “Do I dare?”
Time to turn back and descend the stair,
With a bald spot in the middle of my hair—
[They will say: “How his hair is growing thin!”]
My morning coat, my collar mounting firmly to the chin,
My necktie rich and modest, but asserted by a simple pin—
[They will say: “But how his arms and legs are thin!”]
Do I dare
Disturb the universe?
In a minute there is time
For decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse.

For I have known them all already, known them all:—
Have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons,
I have measured out my life with coffee spoons;
I know the voices dying with a dying fall
Beneath the music from a farther room.
So how should I presume?

And I have known the eyes already, known them all—
The eyes that fix you in a formulated phrase,
And when I am formulated, sprawling on a pin,
When I am pinned and wriggling on the wall,
Then how should I begin
To spit out all the butt-ends of my days and ways?
And how should I presume?

And I have known the arms already, known them all—
Arms that are braceleted and white and bare
[But in the lamplight, downed with light brown hair!]
It is perfume from a dress
That makes me so digress?
Arms that lie along a table, or wrap about a shawl.
And should I then presume?
And how should I begin?
. . . . .
Shall I say, I have gone at dusk through narrow streets
And watched the smoke that rises from the pipes
Of lonely men in shirt-sleeves, leaning out of windows?…

I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas.
. . . . .
And the afternoon, the evening, sleeps so peacefully!
Smoothed by long fingers,
Asleep … tired … or it malingers,
Stretched on the floor, here beside you and me.
Should I, after tea and cakes and ices,
Have the strength to force the moment to its crisis?
But though I have wept and fasted, wept and prayed,
Though I have seen my head [grown slightly bald] brought in upon a platter,
I am no prophet—and here’s no great matter;
I have seen the moment of my greatness flicker,
And I have seen the eternal Footman hold my coat, and snicker,
And in short, I was afraid.

And would it have been worth it, after all,
After the cups, the marmalade, the tea,
Among the porcelain, among some talk of you and me,
Would it have been worth while,
To have bitten off the matter with a smile,
To have squeezed the universe into a ball
To roll it toward some overwhelming question,
To say: “I am Lazarus, come from the dead,
Come back to tell you all, I shall tell you all”—
If one, settling a pillow by her head,
Should say: “That is not what I meant at all.
That is not it, at all.”

And would it have been worth it, after all,
Would it have been worth while,
After the sunsets and the dooryards and the sprinkled streets,
After the novels, after the teacups, after the skirts that trail along the floor—
And this, and so much more?—
It is impossible to say just what I mean!
But as if a magic lantern threw the nerves in patterns on a screen:
Would it have been worth while
If one, settling a pillow or throwing off a shawl,
And turning toward the window, should say:
“That is not it at all,
That is not what I meant, at all.”
. . . . .
No! I am not Prince Hamlet, nor was meant to be;
Am an attendant lord, one that will do
To swell a progress, start a scene or two,
Advise the prince; no doubt, an easy tool,
Deferential, glad to be of use,
Politic, cautious, and meticulous;
Full of high sentence, but a bit obtuse;
At times, indeed, almost ridiculous—
Almost, at times, the Fool.

I grow old … I grow old …
I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled.

Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?
I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach.
I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.

I do not think that they will sing to me.

I have seen them riding seaward on the waves
Combing the white hair of the waves blown back
When the wind blows the water white and black.

We have lingered in the chambers of the sea
By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown
Till human voices wake us, and we drown.


**************************
No matter how many poems I read, Prufrock is still my favorite. Please share your favorite poems with the class!

What flavor are you quiz Your Result: Strawberry   You are fun and creative. You Probably are fond of art and very colorful. Even though you may not realize it, you probably make people smile and are fun to be around!
Vanilla
Chocolate
What flavor are you quiz Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Date:	2009-01-23 11:27
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	grateful

"While we have come a long way since the Stonewall riots in 1969, we still have a lot of work to do. Too often, the issue of LGBT rights is exploited by those seeking to divide us. But at its core, this issue is about who we are as Americans. It's about whether this nation is going to live up to its founding promise of equality by treating all its citizens with dignity and respect."
-- Barack Obama, June 1, 2007

I <3 you, Mr. President!!!

Date:	2009-01-23 11:04
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	exhausted

I got into work yesterday and found out they cut twenty positions on campus... so some friends of mine are scrambling to find new positions in the agency- I guess they were provided with a list of what is available where and a reminder that if they don't take one of these other positions, they won't be eligible for unemployment... Unreal! Then I was looking forward to a nice evening at the house... only to find that at the last minute that I was taking someone to the TOBY KEITH concert in Albany... oh em gee, dude. But it wasn't quite as deplorable as I was anticipating since he didn't try to talk about the state of the nation or anything. He did insist on singing that song about how we'll put a boot up your ass, it's the American way... wtf? Also annoying was security dudes standing right in front of us trying to monitor some drunk people. And my shift totally ends at 11:15pm, but didn't make it out of the house until 2am; at least I know I will have to flex my hours either today or tomorrow due to the new absolutely no overtime rule... But I totally don't get how, if we are in such dire financial peril, they could give us all these sweet flexible spending debit cards with $750 established in it for all employees... It's so fucking sweet. You can use it to pay copays, get prescriptions, OTC drugs... I used it this morning to get Clear Eyes (I no longer have to pay for this shit out of pocket!!!!), vitamin c drops, cough drops, cold medicine... and I got the nice stuff just because I could. It's pretty lame that they built a Walgreens directly across from Rite Aid, and I was going to possibly not shop there.. but then I realized that I should at least compare prices because paying more is just silly... and everything I wanted was about a dollar cheaper at Walgreens... so at least I can get something slightly cheaper without making the dreaded trek to Walmart. Although I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have paid $11 for a snow/ice scraper at Walmart. Maybe I would have. I don't know. Also, before the concert, we went to Outback Steakhouse. The End.

Dog and Elephant are BFF’s

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